Seriously, read this! Why I have the best husband in the world

Last night Nathan and I celebrated our anniversary. We went to dinner at Brownstones; Nathan had a BLT and I had a veggie burger, both were excellent. The free piece of raspberry truffle cake we got because it was our anniversary was also excellent. After dinner we decided to see a movie, and as luck would have it, New Moon had finally made it to the cheap theater. Nathan and I both enjoyed the books, so we were excited to go to the movie now that we could afford it.

I'm not going to go into a whole review of what I did and didn't like about the movie. The only thing important to my story is that there is a scene in which the lead actress gets a bloody head wound, so her guy friend takes off his shirt to use it to staunch the flow. (All of you gals that have seen the movie are nodding knowingly, and maybe feeling just a little bit giddy.) At that point there was a ripple of feminine exclamation around the theater, and I was not excluded. That is because he goes fromthis
to this.

A fun, kind, all-around nice guy that you like, turns into the Native American god of Hotness. He was built, not like a "Mr. Universe: his skin is about to split over his muscles" kind of built, but a "Please sweep me away!" kind. What made it even better was that he was still nice and humble and funny, and he didn't try to show off his muscles. I know there was more to the movie after that (because I remember him being shirtless a couple more times) but really, who cares? As we left the theater I had the biggest, dumbest grin on my face, and I was giggling like I was 12 years old.

You must understand, I have never been the type to look at an actor and say "He is so hot!" I could never understand girls that did. To me, attractiveness is about more than looks. I've known so many rude, cruel people who were "good looking" that I have to be careful to remain neutral and not assume that someone who spends a lot of time on their appearance is shallow and mean. How can someone be attractive if you don't know them?

So this experience caught me totally off-guard, and frankly, I'm wondering if my lemonade at the pub was spiked. There has to be an explanation for me losing my mind and dignity over a 17 year old boy. Maybe I was tired, or maybe it was hormones. It's impossible that I could go to pieces over something as silly as a sculpted set of abs, no matter how absolutely freakin' awesome they--

Ahem. On with the story.

So, as we were driving home I kept thinking about that scene and giggling idiotically. If I had been in the car with my sister or one of my girl friends I would have been saying "Wasn't he so hot? When he pulled his shirt off I was like, 'Whoa!' Why does she like her pale vampire when she could have him?" But I was with my husband.

My very silent husband.

Finally I apologized.

"I'm sorry, Honey," [giggle, giggle] "I'm going to stop now. You are the best husband ever. If you were carrying on about how hot an actress was, I would slug you."

"Yes, you would!"

"I know, I'm [giggle] sorry. I'm going to stop now." [giggle giggle, wiping eyes] "Okay, I need to call a girl, my sister or someone. This isn't the sort of thing I should be talking about with my husband."

When I got home I called my sister, who was too busy with friends to talk for long, but when I started my story (So, we went to see New Moon) she said knowingly, "Ahhhhh, Jacob. I understand completely." And when her friends asked what we were talking about, she said "New Moon" and I heard them all in the background say, "Ahhhhh, Jacob."

Unfortunately, the call was not as therapeutic as I had hoped, and my giddiness got steadily worse as the night got later. Soon the giggles were gone and I was laughing, rolling on the floor of our living room, struck silly with the hilariousness of my husband's and brother's appalled reactions to my ridiculous behavior.

It was a vicious cycle.

We went to play laser tag until the place closed at 11:00, and then we came home and snuggled on the couch and watched Robin Hood, Prince of Thieves. At 1:00 a.m. I was still giggly over Jacob.

Today, I am still married. That is why I have the best husband in the whole wide world!